5 Fatal Mistakes That Lead To Divorce

There are multiple mistakes that people make in marriage that can lead to a complete breakdown and ultimately divorce.  This article covers five of them

Infidelity:  The act of infidelity destroys the very basic requirement of every relationship: trust.  Once trust is broken, rebuilding a relationship is nearly impossible.  The act of betraying someone who has entrusted another with their life, hopes, dreams and future can shatter a person and the relationship may never be the same again.

Lack of Maturity:  When one spouse finds they are carrying a greater amount of work, in and out of the house, while the other seems to be busy doing nothing – then maturity (or lack thereof) can be a fatal mistake in a marriage.  Although, enjoying life is definitely a positive attribute, the inability to take on decision making, financial growth, household or family responsibilities are all significant signs of immaturity, and can pull a relationship into divorce court quickly. Sometimes it is both spouses that have maturity issues to address. The refusal to “grow up” is often a cause of divorce.

Alcohol and/or Drug Abuse:  The implications of both of these addictions are almost too obvious to explain.  The affects upon a relationship and family can be devastating to all members.  Addiction, in any form, creates distrust, financial distress, erratic behavior, leaving the spouse or family members with guilt and added responsibilities.  Many addicts, whether the problem is drugs or alcohol -  steal, lie and deceive those around them. This creates complete dysfunction within a home environment.  

Control:  When one or both persons within a relationship attempts to control, either through manipulation or intimidation, they are not only showing a lack of self-esteem, they are disrupting the spirit of what marriage is supposed to be: partnership. Control is very subtle and may be difficult to see initially, but often becomes very serious. Whether the problem is one person controlling the other or an eternal power struggle between husband and wife, if the problem is not addressed, there can be no happy ending. 

Dishonesty: Deceptive behavior, such as lying, reduces any relationship to non-existent status.  When a spouse fails to give an honest answer, by either out and out deception, or by withholding information, communication breaks down, and trust is broken.  Lies often have to be covered with additional lies, and soon nothing being uttered is without some type of deception.  Keeping a relationship open and honest in communication is one of the very basic first steps in preventing many fatal mistakes in a marriage or relationship.

These fatal mistakes can be prevented by being open to self-analysis and choosing to be less critical of your partner. A “fatal mistake” is tied up more in refusal to work through the problems rather than the problems themselves. So much of what goes wrong in a marriage can be traced back to dysfunctional communication. Focusing on positive attributes and making the decision to learn how to communicate with each other are the best way to keep a marriage alive. While any of the above issues can be fatal to a marriage, they don’t have to be. Contrition, forgiveness and the willingness of both partners to work through problems can keep mistakes from ruining a marriage.






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